I have counseled many couples whose marriages were in trouble. Many were ready to quit and they were giving counseling a shot because they were ordered to by the court or one spouse begged or strong-armed the other into it.
There are so many potential marriage problems that come up after a few years of marriage that could have been discovered, counseled through, or even deal breakers before the wedding if the couple had received some pre-marital counseling.
The counselor will ask you hard questions about topics that have never come up during the dating process or have come up but have been overlooked as a real problem. (It’s called denial)
One of the things a counselor can help you do is see that you might be getting married for the wrong reasons …
Here are ten wrong reasons for getting married.
1) Don’t get married because you want to get away from another relationship, out of your parent’s house, or you want better living conditions.
2) Don’t get married because your parents or others don’t like him or you want to hurt your parents.
3) Don’t get married just to keep from hurting someone’s feelings. I was counseling a lady once who was afraid if she broke up with her boyfriend he would kill himself. He was making threats.
4) Don’t get married because you want to rescue someone or you feel sorry for him.
5) Don’t get married in order to feel better about yourself.
6) Don’t get married because you are afraid you are getting too old or the fishing pool is getting too small.
7) Don’t get married because you are afraid of being alone.
8) Don’t get married because you are in pain or lonely because of a recent break up.
9) Don’t get married because you feel guilty about having sex.
10) Don’t get married because you are pregnant.
You may be thinking, “Are you kidding me?” No I am not. Marriage, even if you really love someone and get married for the right reasons, is hard work.
Now … When I am counseling someone or a couple who believes they got married for the wrong reasons, there is still hope.
For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Phil 4:13
You can still love and be in love through Christ who will give you strength.
Can you relate or do you know someone who can?
Do you know someone who started out for the wrong reasons and are still married and have a good marriage?